Chiron Ascendant Line :: Wounds, Healing, Duality
If you’ve read anything about Astrocartography from me, you will see I discuss the positive and negative aspects from every line.
Like anything in life, there is always an element of duality. Nothing is fully positive or negative. There is nuance and multiple expressions of energy. That’s why generic Astrocartography reads can be harmful, because it doesn’t take into account the depth of our charts and unique experience.
Our hardest lines in Astrocartography, our hardest placements and aspects in our natal chart, are our greatest teachers.
Where we struggle, is where we grow, learn, and develop wisdom.
Where we have to work harder for something, we learn valuable skills and greater appreciation and gratitude.
The hardest places to live and hardest times in our life, we often can look back on and see the gifts that came through the struggle, if we choose to look for them.
And Chiron is one of those amazing, yet very heavy parts of our chart.
What is Chiron?
Chiron is the wounded healer in Astrology.
It is technically a comet, and it represents the part of our chart where we have been subject to our greatest wounding.
And, in turn, it is the place in our chart where we are able to provide the most healing to ourselves and others.
Chiron is expressed in a multitude of ways. Some of these expressions can be found in::
- the sign it is in
- the house it is located in
- the degree it is in
- and the aspects to it
Your wounds will express themself in different ways throughout your chart, and there are other ways in our life in which we experience trauma and wounding outside of Chiron as well.
But, for the sake of this post, I’m only talking Chiron.
The post on Chiron and where you bring healing to others can be found here.
For the past seven years, I have lived on my Chiron Ascendant line. The Ascendant being the body, your persona, identity, approach to life, appearance. I have also been on my Moon/Chiron Crossing line.
In this same location, I’ve been living on my Moon Midheaven and Uranus Descendant line as well, so other energies of disruption have been at play in this location. I’m sharing this because not everyone’s experience on a Chiron line will be the same as mine, due to my natal chart expression.
Living on a Chiron line is not for the weak.
It is a deeply transformative and (POTENTIALLY) healing line.
This is something I see often in Chiron write ups is the healing potential that Chiron offers. And that’s exactly it, it’s potential.
Healing Trauma
Where potential exists in the natal chart does not mean it will actualize without consciousness and/or effort.
You must be dedicated to stepping out of victimhood and into healing your wounds in order to actualize the healing potential of Chiron. You also must have access to methods and modes of approriate healing for whatever your wounds may be which can be a very privileged experience. Health care, psychotherapy and other healing modalities are not always available or accessible to everyone.
And when it comes to stepping out of victimhood, that’s a lot harder for some to do. When you have been, in fact, a victim… it’s harder to see through to the other side.
There are circumstances and experiences in our life that do in fact happen to us that are outside of our control.
And depending on how many or how harsh of these experiences you’ve had, or how little reparative experiences we had, etc. makes it harder to rewire the neurological response in your brain to trauma, abuse, etc.
It takes even more active participation and often somatic therapy and other solutions to get to the other side of healing.
And if you know anything about trauma, it lives in the body. It’s not something you can intellectualize your way out of or just wake up and choose a different experience one day.
Sure, perspective is everything. Having the focus of wanting to heal, wanting to see the world through a different lens, wanting to empower yourself and lead a fulfilling life can be the drive that helps you heal and come out the other side.
But, so is compassion and empathy for yourself, your experiences, and understanding how trauma functions within the body and the actual effort it takes to heal/rewire/unlearn/reprogram.
Chiron Ascendant Line Potentials & My Experience
I’m sharing all of this because for some, Chiron lines (after an extended stay) become this beautiful expression of healing and growth.
And to others, there is only so much exposure to your wounds that you can take before you begin to actual create more harm than good.
When you live on a Chiron line, especially an Ascendant (the body), psychosomatic illness becomes more of a possibility.
As you continuously revisit your wounds (for the potential of healing them), you are also somatically re-experiencing your trauma in a more lived out way on this line.
Continuously reimagining, re-experiencing, and re-feeling your wounds on an almost non-stop basis, can be detrimental to your nervous system.
You can be the most resourced person, with all of the nervous system regulation tools possible, and it still can become too much or too frequent for you to handle.
My personal experience on my Moon/Chiron crossing line and Chiron Ascendant line has been exactly this.
When you first move to the line, the energy is subtle. If one were to want deeper access to healing without the long term side effects, I would recommend a 1-3 year stay on the line (or even a healing retreat).
You can visit, or temporarily stay for a therapeutic sabbatical. You do have deeper access to healing on these lines. If you’re doing something like EMDR therapy, you have (in my opinion) deeper access to your trauma to then be able to bring it forward to heal.
But long term stays, in my experience tend to become too much. You can’t escape your wounds. You heal, and you heal, and you heal, and you heal. And eventually, you get fed up on “the healing journey” and just want to live without having to acknowledge your pain, wounding, or trauma.
I became obsessed with healing moving here.
Then with trauma, understanding how it works in the brain and body, how to heal and integrate and move through it.
I then wanted to help others with healing theirs through compassion, empathy, and holding space and support.
And then I hit a wall. Every previous illness I had ever experienced resurfaced. (Clearly they hadn’t fully been healed). There also was psychosomatic experiencing of suppressed emotions… because let’s be honest who wants to sit in potentially heavy emotions all the time? It became too much.
You also (with Chiron on the Ascendant) are viewed as wounded/or a healer. People experience you (Ascendant) through your Chiron energy both the wounded side and healed side. And you can’t always choose which energy people perceive you in.
And I’ve found especially with the Moon/Chiron crossing line, that my moods and emotions are filtered through the lens of my wounding… making me more sensitive and taking things more personally in this location… which I can zoom out and witness, but haven’t quite learned how to fully not participate in.
Loneliness, disconnect, and separateness are other potentials especially from the Moon/Chiron crossing line.
The Purpose I’ve Found From My Chiron Ascendant Line
I share all of this not to sit in negativity, but to honestly share my experience and because part of my natal chart is Chiron Square my North Node. I am meant to sift through my wounds, heal them and share the experience to move into my North Node energy.
This seven year stay has been purposeful in helping me integrate so many things – within myself, but also through learning all these different healing modalities.
Here with the Moon on my Midheaven and Chiron on my Ascendant, it’s been funny and a little annoying to witness that when I share vulnerably and about the heavier parts of my experience, that is what tends to resonate most.
I definitely don’t totally relate to this persona. I’ve always been more playful, optimistic, and joyful (with gate 58 twice in my HD chart). I’ve had to sit with this feeling of no longer feeling as fun as I used to and grieve that version (at least for while I’m here) and work harder to try to access that part of my personality.
And I think I still am those things, just through a different lens while I’m in this location. We still laugh a lot in circle. I still joke around and prioritize play and freedom in my daily life.
But ultimately, my stay here has taught me empowering others through compassion of the self.
Truly believing that there’s nothing wrong with you, your personality, who you are, the current expression of your energy, what you like and dislike, the current circumstances that you’re experiencing, your past wounds and the byproducts they have had on you, or what you choose to focus on at this time in your life.
They are all part of the human experience.
And you aren’t any less lovable because of your hardships. If anything, we relate through struggle. I see it in Circle all the time.
We come together to support each other through times of need. We listen and hold space. We share similar experiences and feel less alone as we navigate the world.
There is beauty and wisdom in healing and acknowledging our wounds.
And there are times in our life where the focus may need to shift to play, fun, and freedom from our past.
Tips When Choosing Lines
Being mindful of Astrocartography can help us make informed decisions about where we move and visit, and it can also limit the places in which our soul is drawn to.
I learned about Astrocartography on the plane ride moving here. I would have never moved here if I had known about it prior.
And I think that’s the purposeful part of leaning into our intuition over logic.
It’s leaning into trust that we are drawn to people, places, and things for a reason.
The things that light our soul up have purpose and value to our evolution and growth – even if they aren’t the most fun, pretty, or easeful times/places/people of our lives.
So, my biggest takeaway from living here is give yourself the ability to leave if a line becomes too much for you. My next location will have more of an exploratory energy first. Leasing instead of buying, trying out different areas, feeling how I somatically feel in my body, listening to my intuitive responses to the place. Do I love the city, yes, but does the city also love me back?
If it gets to a point where your experience becomes too heavy; it’s ok to relocate to a more easeful place. “Running away” from Pluto, Saturn, Chiron, Uranus and Neptune lines and even North/South Nodes lines… honestly makes sense. And you will honestly have a different experience somewhere else. Yes “you follow you wherever you go,” AND some places are easier places for you to face yourself and/or enjoy life in.
Simultaneously, the acknowledgement of the duality of trust, that if you are in a place that seems to create more hardship for you, that there may be a purpose to your overall experience of evolution, growth, and wisdom.
I’ve wanted to leave this city for years, AND, the timing hasn’t felt right. I haven’t been cued into where the next place is to go yet, and I am a firm believer it’s because there is still more to learn and share here.
If I hadn’t experienced the depth and pain of this location::
- I wouldn’t have ever done EMDR and truly healed parts of my past
- I wouldn’t have learned THIS much about Astrology and Human Design
- I wouldn’t have learned about Astrocartography this in depth
- I wouldn’t have deeply studied Astrological transits
- I may have never hosted Women’s Circles – giving women a place to process their own emotions and wounds and to extend the compassion I learned to have for myself
- I wouldn’t have developed this ability to be alone and content with it
- I wouldn’t have gotten in depth testing to find out my underlying health issues
- And I wouldn’t have truly sat in the lesson that nothing is forever and to make the most of what you have when you have it, to sit in gratitude, because the wheel always turns
This iteration of my life is because of the not so cute lines I moved to. It has taught me a lot, and it simultaneously has become too much.
As we always say in circle, two truths.
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